Before children understand proper grammar in our culture and language, they will make common mistakes. Typically, you might hear a toddler say "me" instead of "I", in a sentence like " me want juice". Between infancy and toddlerhood, a cognitive change takes place where they see themselves in infancy as one being or rather an appendage to their mother or primary caregiver and a transformation happens where they emerge into viewing themselves as a separate entity and begin to use the "I" pronoun in their sentences. Most teachers have noticed that autistic kids mix up their pronouns.
For autistic kids, I believe two things are happening. First, they stay in that infancy developmental stage a tad bit longer delaying their cognitive ability to see themselves as a separate entity. At the same time, they form an atypical attachment to their mother and/or caregiver. Normally, one might think that would actually make it easier to do so. Secondly, the audio processing center in their minds are functioning differently, so they learn differently and language is not received in the same way as others. They are creatively wired you could say. I believe that bridge is crossed differently in their mind, but that it is not impossible for them to merge on the same path at a later point having gone in a different direction. It is just achieved differently.
In my own children, I have experienced a variety of different things during this developmental task. My oldest child, he was delayed but he went through typical stages. About age three, I started seeing typical attachment behaviors. My next child, he hovered in this stage far longer than I ever hoped, desired , nor dreamed and I am also seeing attachment issues, so that must play a role too. My youngest child, now being tested, he reminds me a lot of my oldest child in this stage but only milder. I have no doubt he is attached because he shows typical behaviors, and he progressed through this stage much faster.
I am not a scientist, but this is what I have observed. Years ago, I did read some research supporting my theory, but it just my thoughts...at present. My spiritual inclination is that they are so attached to their Heavenly Creator, that even after birth to their earthly parents, it is hard to detach that connection that is strong, and it somewhat interrupts their ability with engaging their new earthly parents. They do form a connection and appreciation to their earthly parents, but they form an atypical attachment too. It must be hard to temporarily be forced to forget that Heavenly place their spirits derived.
