All my "auties", all my boys, they have gone through a stage where they are building up vocabulary in their mind, and they seem to verbally "stim" on certain words. Doctors refer to it as "echolalia" and they just keep saying one word, over and over, kinda like a broken record.
Right now, my youngest, he is stimming on the word B-R-A-T. He will start breaking rules, say the word, and giggle uncontrollably, then say, "that not funny". Now, I remember saying "that is not funny" to him one day when I heard himself refer to himself that way, and I have no idea where exactly he heard it, but it reminds me sorta how toddlers learning language in the copy cat stage repeat everything they hear, good or bad. I know it will pass, but in the mean time I feel sad when I hear him say it. I doubt he understands that word in the true sense of the word and meaning like I do.....so I will just ignore it.
When my oldest was in this stage, he heard in the word S-P-A-N-K at school from a kid that picked a fight with him the bathroom. The kid said to him, "don't (do something he didn't like) or I will spank you" and it scared him so much that all he could communicate to everyone was "i am going to spank you" in that echolalia kind of way. He didn't have language fully at that time to tell Mommy what happened at school, and no one could guess hearing him say that he would be referring to that incident. If you haven't already guessed, then I will tell you....that was a stressful time for us....because there are so many implications with that expression. A teacher over heard him say it, and she thought the worst of us as parents. She called an undercover cop located at the school to interview my child, without my permission. My child if interviewed would have said, "yes" to all questions he did not know....and I knew that, but did they consider that, umm, no! I got a special call from the school and came down to hear their concerns and felt interrogated myself. I was not a happy camper that I learned that due to lack of funding for paying for paras in the school district they started cutting their hours. The special education teacher decided to ignore his IEP and not give him a teacher's aide anymore, so he went from completely depending upon one, to uh, NONE....hello, don't you think you should wean a child first? Not a good idea! I doubt this incident would have taken place if he was not sent alone to the bathroom. I figured out their was a conflict in the bathroom and that is where the word was learned, that he meant "hit" by that word, but I didn't get the full story till much later, when his language came later. To my benefit, I had just became a foster care parent, so we had a back ground check done with that six months and training and was cleared to the state to place kids in our home. They knew us. When they got the call, they felt these claims were not even valid, so they did not further investigate. We didn't even know they were called! It came up in our annual visit where were review our license. I just find it ironic. It was a mixed blessing they knew us so well.
I am glad my youngest chose a less politically suggestive word to repeat. I have decided it could be worse.....
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Sunday, November 27, 2011
ESY
ESY stands for Extended Year Services. If you notice your child regressing when they have time off from school, then you can ask at the next I.E.P. Meeting when you sit down to assess goals to see if your child qualifies for these programs. Usually, they do, but they don't initiate those needs even if it is obvious. They are going to wait till the parent or caregiver mention it before they consider your child for that program. They will test throughout the next year to see if they retain what they learn. If the child does not qualify, then you will have to pay for tutoring on your own. However, if the child does qualify then they will recommend a summer program at the middle of the break to review things with the child -- typically on a traditional calendar schedule.
We did this every year because twelve weeks was way too long for my little guy and we felt like he lost all we worked towards and it was frustrating to say the least to feel like we had to start again near the beginning. When we moved near an area that had the option of a " year around schedule" and never had more than three weeks off at any one time, I did notice a good improvement in his learning. It has been a great benefit. If you have that option, then it something you might want to consider.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Deficiencies
As my son gets older, I see a common thread at IEP meetings. He does not understand abstract concepts, but he does just fine with the pragmatic skills. He struggles with problem solving skills and that just affects so many areas. His challenge is to understand expressions that are abstract like IDIOMS, where people do not say EXACTLY what they mean. I hear jokes all the time about how men really don't "Get" women because they are too abstract, but this really "takes the cake". He just does not understand different form of expressions, like sarcastic humor for example. He will take you literally at what you say.
Reading comprehension seems to be a constant struggle. I usually give him a post it note to stick on his chapter while reading and hand him a pencil. The post it note, asks, "Who?", "What is happening in this chapter?", "Where?" and "Why?' and it helps him to look for those clues while reading. I will stop him at the end of each chapter to summarize what he read and talk about it. I am training him to do so. This has greatly helped his reading skills this past two years.
Language arts is just not his thing. Although, I loved the resource teacher he had for many years at his previous school who focused on this area. She must have loved language arts because she focused on this area, and I did see a great improvement in his understanding during her time with him. If you saw him now, then you would be amazed with his ability to organize his thoughts into a written form. It is one of his favorite past times. He writes his own stories, comic strips, and plays that he persuades his kid sisters to play act out with him. I am so thankful for that inspired woman! She's helped him out a great deal. His current two page summary book reports look awesome and like a kid for his age group, but Mom still had to edit it because I occasionally still see grammar and punctuation mistakes.
They are always working on social skills too. It is tailored to his needs. He typically gets these goals interlaced with speech therapy goals because his speech is just fine, but the way he talks or interacts with others comes out through speech.
One of the biggest reasons, that he has for needing special education services is not so much for the educational goals, although in order to get special educational services you have to make up educational goals...but the big reason he still has help at school is more behavioral concerns. He is a perfectionist. He struggles with the ability to regulate this emotions by himself and still needs coping strategies. As the gets older, the demands of school get harder, so this plays a role. I think it is difficult for him to process that each teacher, which changes each year, they have different expectations of the students. He gets overstimulated in a big group and works better in a smaller group, but all the schools we have attended are overcrowded so he has to cope with bigger class sizes.
They give him sensory breaks to help him with the behavioral things and help him take a "breather" and remind him of the coping strategies while there. It is only about ten minutes long, but long enough to take a short recess from whatever worked him up. They redirect him and send him back to class.
When he has the emotional support placements lined up, he functions at a very impressive cognitive level. However, we learned last year, as we moved to a different state and dealt with many changes that change is very hard for him and also he clashed with his teacher, that he functioned at a much lower cognitive level. I was tempted to re-assign him to a new teacher because I was really concerned, but then I realized that life is not that perfect. He needed to learn how to deal with conflicts too and clearly this was one of those moments. I decided it was good experience for him to learn to deal with life's unexpected things. We survived that ordeal and learned a lot from it. I just hope most years we have things going smoothly, but as you know, it is okay to occasionally deal with the "bumps in the road".
Reading comprehension seems to be a constant struggle. I usually give him a post it note to stick on his chapter while reading and hand him a pencil. The post it note, asks, "Who?", "What is happening in this chapter?", "Where?" and "Why?' and it helps him to look for those clues while reading. I will stop him at the end of each chapter to summarize what he read and talk about it. I am training him to do so. This has greatly helped his reading skills this past two years.
Language arts is just not his thing. Although, I loved the resource teacher he had for many years at his previous school who focused on this area. She must have loved language arts because she focused on this area, and I did see a great improvement in his understanding during her time with him. If you saw him now, then you would be amazed with his ability to organize his thoughts into a written form. It is one of his favorite past times. He writes his own stories, comic strips, and plays that he persuades his kid sisters to play act out with him. I am so thankful for that inspired woman! She's helped him out a great deal. His current two page summary book reports look awesome and like a kid for his age group, but Mom still had to edit it because I occasionally still see grammar and punctuation mistakes.
They are always working on social skills too. It is tailored to his needs. He typically gets these goals interlaced with speech therapy goals because his speech is just fine, but the way he talks or interacts with others comes out through speech.
One of the biggest reasons, that he has for needing special education services is not so much for the educational goals, although in order to get special educational services you have to make up educational goals...but the big reason he still has help at school is more behavioral concerns. He is a perfectionist. He struggles with the ability to regulate this emotions by himself and still needs coping strategies. As the gets older, the demands of school get harder, so this plays a role. I think it is difficult for him to process that each teacher, which changes each year, they have different expectations of the students. He gets overstimulated in a big group and works better in a smaller group, but all the schools we have attended are overcrowded so he has to cope with bigger class sizes.
They give him sensory breaks to help him with the behavioral things and help him take a "breather" and remind him of the coping strategies while there. It is only about ten minutes long, but long enough to take a short recess from whatever worked him up. They redirect him and send him back to class.
When he has the emotional support placements lined up, he functions at a very impressive cognitive level. However, we learned last year, as we moved to a different state and dealt with many changes that change is very hard for him and also he clashed with his teacher, that he functioned at a much lower cognitive level. I was tempted to re-assign him to a new teacher because I was really concerned, but then I realized that life is not that perfect. He needed to learn how to deal with conflicts too and clearly this was one of those moments. I decided it was good experience for him to learn to deal with life's unexpected things. We survived that ordeal and learned a lot from it. I just hope most years we have things going smoothly, but as you know, it is okay to occasionally deal with the "bumps in the road".
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Humor
Since I am a foster care parent, I sometimes have kids in my care that aren't mine. I got the privilege of spending a week with a girl still in foster care at age 20. She has Aspergers. In many ways, she reminds me of my oldest son. She is very high functioning and at this age, she is very independent in many ways, but you see the need to "walk her through" new stuff. I already do this with my son, so it felt "right at home". She sticks to a bus schedule with certain bus stops she knows and having to take a different bus stop to my home made her uneasy. I could see it. I could see the disconnect in her mind as it was unfamiliar territory and she didn't like the change.
I was told she is very social. She was very engaging in conversation. However, her social abilities seemed limited to me. She would go on and on about her interests. I noticed she lost interest when it was not HER interest. I am told that is typical and definitely an Aspergers trait. I was telling stories to the younger foster kid I also had this week about how awkward middle school was. I laughed a lot with the younger girl. I did notice that the older girl with Aspergers did not laugh and seem to miss the humor in it all. If she did laugh, then it was sorta a forced laugh because she didn't want to be left out. My son does that when we tell jokes. My son likes to take the initiative to tell jokes or at least try and they never make sense. We usually laugh to be kind, but he really is clueless in that department. Sometimes, when we are alone, I try to help him tell jokes.
Later, I can say that this girl also tried to share a story that was similar, like an embarrassing sort of story that would make one laugh....and she connected beautifully with what we were talking about and showed the ability to follow up with a similar story....however, she told her story in rather a mechanical way telling details that were kind of irrelevant to the story and you kinda felt lost in the story but in the end, there was the embarrassing part in the story. I think most people would have stopped listening and be bored with the story but we hung in there and let her finish. At the end, it was kinda funny. We all laughed. I think she just thinks in a more technical kind of way.
I was told she is very social. She was very engaging in conversation. However, her social abilities seemed limited to me. She would go on and on about her interests. I noticed she lost interest when it was not HER interest. I am told that is typical and definitely an Aspergers trait. I was telling stories to the younger foster kid I also had this week about how awkward middle school was. I laughed a lot with the younger girl. I did notice that the older girl with Aspergers did not laugh and seem to miss the humor in it all. If she did laugh, then it was sorta a forced laugh because she didn't want to be left out. My son does that when we tell jokes. My son likes to take the initiative to tell jokes or at least try and they never make sense. We usually laugh to be kind, but he really is clueless in that department. Sometimes, when we are alone, I try to help him tell jokes.
Later, I can say that this girl also tried to share a story that was similar, like an embarrassing sort of story that would make one laugh....and she connected beautifully with what we were talking about and showed the ability to follow up with a similar story....however, she told her story in rather a mechanical way telling details that were kind of irrelevant to the story and you kinda felt lost in the story but in the end, there was the embarrassing part in the story. I think most people would have stopped listening and be bored with the story but we hung in there and let her finish. At the end, it was kinda funny. We all laughed. I think she just thinks in a more technical kind of way.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
When to diagnose?
When do we seek for a diagnose? Good question!
I can say the sooner the better for treatment options. However, if you do it too soon, then you may miss some underlying issues that don't show until later.
I am thankful that I got my oldest child into an intensive therapy and language program before age 3. The results were fantastic. He is the poster child of why you don't delay a diagnose and enroll them in a therapy program. He responded really well to it. Within six months, he was talking and responding to structure and routine. It was awesome.
However, follow your gut feeling.
My next child, I was not ready to take him to be diagnosed and I let some well meaning person persuade me to take him in for testing. He was borderline and we didn't get a proper diagnose from him, and half his issues didn't start showing until two years LATER. I regret that I let him be tested at that time. End result, he was enrolled into a program that didn't work out for him anyway. I wish I had waited. We took him to another doctor for a second opinion and they were too lazy to test them appropriately and wanted to rely on other doctor's notes. We have struggled through the years to get some to take us seriously. We know and have known through the years he has OTHER issues unaddressed despite we KNOW he is on the autistic spectrum. They just want to say, "oh, he's autistic!" ...uh, well duh! That initial testing set the stage for the rest of his life. I had nothing else to bring to the plate except he is on the spectrum. The only thing, we were able to do was get a psychologist to see him at age 7 and agree he had hyperactivity issues and agree to try to medicate him for a while. The medicine helped for a while and then he built a tolerance for it. The side effects were worse than the original symptoms, so we took the course of natural remedies. He's a long story, but basically I wish I had waited until he was 7 years old to have him tested. I believe he would have been able to get special education services regardless of the diagnose because his needs were obvious.
I have chosen with my youngest to do things differently. I am allowing the school to do their testing for placement purposes and making an IEP goal sheet for him so the teacher knows his needs and they have a plan at school in treating him. However, I am going to wait till he is 7 years old to take him where they diagnose him. He is very high functioning, if he is on the autistic spectrum. I don't see the need to do it before that point. The school is handling his needs beautifully.
I am comfortable with that decision after what I experienced with the older two boys. I have had people ask me and I decline answering. It is none of their business. The school should NEVER ask you unless their is some legal reason too.
I can say the sooner the better for treatment options. However, if you do it too soon, then you may miss some underlying issues that don't show until later.
I am thankful that I got my oldest child into an intensive therapy and language program before age 3. The results were fantastic. He is the poster child of why you don't delay a diagnose and enroll them in a therapy program. He responded really well to it. Within six months, he was talking and responding to structure and routine. It was awesome.
However, follow your gut feeling.
My next child, I was not ready to take him to be diagnosed and I let some well meaning person persuade me to take him in for testing. He was borderline and we didn't get a proper diagnose from him, and half his issues didn't start showing until two years LATER. I regret that I let him be tested at that time. End result, he was enrolled into a program that didn't work out for him anyway. I wish I had waited. We took him to another doctor for a second opinion and they were too lazy to test them appropriately and wanted to rely on other doctor's notes. We have struggled through the years to get some to take us seriously. We know and have known through the years he has OTHER issues unaddressed despite we KNOW he is on the autistic spectrum. They just want to say, "oh, he's autistic!" ...uh, well duh! That initial testing set the stage for the rest of his life. I had nothing else to bring to the plate except he is on the spectrum. The only thing, we were able to do was get a psychologist to see him at age 7 and agree he had hyperactivity issues and agree to try to medicate him for a while. The medicine helped for a while and then he built a tolerance for it. The side effects were worse than the original symptoms, so we took the course of natural remedies. He's a long story, but basically I wish I had waited until he was 7 years old to have him tested. I believe he would have been able to get special education services regardless of the diagnose because his needs were obvious.
I have chosen with my youngest to do things differently. I am allowing the school to do their testing for placement purposes and making an IEP goal sheet for him so the teacher knows his needs and they have a plan at school in treating him. However, I am going to wait till he is 7 years old to take him where they diagnose him. He is very high functioning, if he is on the autistic spectrum. I don't see the need to do it before that point. The school is handling his needs beautifully.
I am comfortable with that decision after what I experienced with the older two boys. I have had people ask me and I decline answering. It is none of their business. The school should NEVER ask you unless their is some legal reason too.
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